Transparency
January 31
Transparency. This is a word that we don’t hear much and people actually run from it. We can and will do everything but really be transparent. Well, I’m not running from it because it brings much healing and peace when you let it flow.
But to understand it let’s look at the definition to help you really understand so you don’t have to fear this part of your life.
The dictionary says that transparency means: the quality that makes it possible to see through something and it’s the quality that makes something obvious or easy to understand.
So being transparent is being easily seen. It make your life, your story, your struggle easy to understand to someone else. It allows your life to touch someone else and help them.
When you are transparent people won’t miss your message. Now that is good!
I put up a post asking women, “What do you struggle with most as a Christian woman” and because I am asking you (and I believe in transparency) I need to answer also. No need to hide. No need to pretend because we all need Jesus and we all need everything His blood and grace gives to us.
I like that my life and my struggles helps others. Why not? I didn’t go through my pain for nothing and neither did you.
But first, why did I ask this question of your struggles? I asked because my ministry is to women and I feel that too many of us are struggling for many reasons but one is we are not looking at other transparent women in the church in the right way. Not all of them but a majority of them. I don’t want to be what I am about to describe because that doesn’t help you.
When I was coming up and going through my situations, all I seemed to see was “perfect” women that didn’t seem to struggle with anything. They seemed to have coffee with God every morning and not struggle in their marriage, family, job. They had the perfect job at the church as the pastor’s wife and loved it. Why wouldn’t she… she was the first lady. NO NO NO and no.
I would go to women’s conferences and there she would be. The well put together speaker. All matching and got her Bible in her hand. She would speak to the audience, but I need her to speak directly to me! Shoot. I had so much junk in my soul I needed her to tell me how to be like her “put together and happy in Jesus”. That is what she was portraying right. It will be all good with Jesus.
Well, she left out a part of her story. She wasn’t transparent. She was this woman we saw…. But how did she get from where I was and I dare say all the other women in the room, to where she is now! It was infuriating to watch. Just tell it all sister, I would say under my breath.
But as life went on I soon discovered we all have struggles. But a lot of us hide them and when you tell them you are rejected for it and looked upon as weak sometimes. So you share nothing. You hide. You only tell part and people only see part of your message.
I want you all to know why I am the way I am and who I am so the message I give is clear.
You are not weak sister. I know I’m not weak. I am very secure in who I am as a woman, life coach and minister. But we need to be transparent to let others see our message clearly and that we all are in process.
If you want more on this topic, I am going to talk about this on my podcast Reveal next week. So, what are my answers to the questions here…..what do I struggle with?
I struggle with….
- Fear of the future. I just worry about how to sustain myself as a divorced woman in the future. I have since divorce. It is getting better, but it is there at times.
- Sweets. I just love them. It is my comfort go to food. To not overindulge in it I can’t buy it or have it in the house. I love to eat sweets and bake sweets. (should make a crème cheese pound cake today… See!!!)
- Family. I am so disconnected from all my family members, and I don’t know why. We have no relationship at all besides my two sons who we are very close. But anyone else…. No relationship.
So you see, I have my things too. We all do. Give me some of your answers. I want to talk about these things.