Quiet Conversations ~ 4

Just Stop Assuming

There is nothing worse than not knowing all the facts in a situation and making an assumption only to find out you went out there in your emotions and actions and were totally wrong. How do I know? Because I did it more than once.

Today’s post is dedicated to all the women that do this on a regular basis and you know who you are. 

Assumption, I believe is one of the worst things that the enemy uses against the mind of the believing wife in your marriage to get you into a totally tormented state.  I am mainly talking today to wives in troubled marriages but this can apply to any of us at any time.

Why do we do this? Why do we fall into assumption in various situations? Honestly, I am not sure but I think we do it as a way to come up with a reason for why something is happening to us in that moment.  We just think our assumption is right. We take a situation like a cheating mate and we assume all kinds of things about that sinful relationship that they are in. When you do this you give the enemy legal ground to torment you.

We assume that that adulterous relationship is a happy one.  We hope it’s not but the devil feeds us that it is. Even if the Word of God says sin is pleasurable for a season then it brings for death, we still assume. We assume they don’t love us. We assume the other woman is doing all sorts of things and saying things to our mate to keep them away. We assume that our mate will do this or that or not do this or that. You get the idea. When in reality…you do not know anything for certain. Or at least almost certain. 

We begin to try to make decisions off of assumption. Wrong idea.

The point I’m making is that if you get in that quiet place with Holy Spirit you will hear Him say to stay out of that line of thinking in your mind. Here is why.

Philippians 4:8 says….

“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.“

Holy Spirit makes it clear what we are to think on. The problem is we don’t obey His instruction. I struggled with this for a long time until finally, I think I got it. I used up a lot of energy, emotionally energy assuming things about my husband that I actually didn’t know for fact, certain, or true. At the end of my assuming, I had worked myself into such a fit of anger, rage, hate, depression, fear and more that it was days to get out of it.

I heard Holy Spirit say to me…

“If you want my peace you must think what I think. Stop going there in your mind. If there is something I want you to know about your husband and the other woman I will tell you.”

I think we as women have an insatiable urge to know things and sometimes we know more than we want to. I remember clearly one time working myself into such a fit of assumption it caused me to get in my car and search and look for my cheating husband, calling around, snooping and all kinds of things that took my gas, time and energy. Not to mention I was in full out disobedience. Holy Spirit told me to not get in my car and look for him anywhere. I didn’t listen. He would say…

“Go home. Did I tell you to be out here. You could get hurt in the wrong neighborhood. I will heal you from this drivenness and pain.”

Only after I heard Him speak did I finally get it and never did it again.

I know you all hurt and you lay in bed at night and you think about things and wonder and assume. Your cooking dinner and you assume. You are sitting in church alone and you assume. You buy groceries and you assume. You just assume. You drive in your car and you assume. You talk to your girlfriends, counselor at church, and anyone that will listen and you assume.

Let me give you some advice. Stop it. Turn your thoughts to the the Beloved and think on what He told you in His word to think on. Everything surrounding the decision to cheat, leave your home and children, depression, pain, fear, anxiety, the other woman, and divorce are not pure, honest,  just, lovely, good report, virtue or praise worthy. So, do not think on them. You can choose what to think on. Trust me I know.

Holy Spirit said in another of our quiet moments together…

“The more time you spend with me the more of me you will be sensitive to and the more you will yield to my will. You do not yield to me because you are not sensitive to my heart.”

My dear sister, find your secret place. Camp out there and listen for His voice, the whisper, the stillness in the noise of your soul. It will take you training yourself to hear Him but He will not leave you ever and He will meet with you.  Selah.