The 34 Year Miracle (a blog story)

Ahahaha ! I got my story in a magazine! Oh my good God!

What a miracle story I have lived. What a miracle to even be in the Victorious Living Magazine with my story. I didn’t even realize God set me up until I was neck deep in the miracle.

I have never been to jail, but could have…but to have my story in this magazine is truly something because in 20 lifetimes I would have never dreamed this up. I am so glad God is God, because He does marvelous things indeed.

So let me give you the back story to this blessing that has been in the making for almost 34 years. When I tell you God is never late but right on time, He is.

Miracles take time to happen

Here goes…

Oct 12, 1990 God came to me and told me I would write a book. I was working a job at Fireman’s Fund Insurance Company and it was just a few months after my mom had died. I was 25 years old and still grieving.

The Holy Spirit came to the side of my desk at lunch while no one else was near the area or my desk. I felt the breeze of His presence next to me like a breeze on a spring day. He spoke to me in a moment of time that seemed like the speed of light and slow motion at the same time. It’s the only way to explain it.

He said, “You’re going to write a book.”

I said, “What am I gonna call it?”

He said, “Tomorrow is Not Promised and it will take wings and go all over.” I wondered inside and then thought to myself without voicing any words how would I get it published?

Now this was before the internet, Google, Amazon etc. It was just me and 1990 and this word from God. He said, “Don’t worry I will get it published. You will write many books but you are to only write what I tell you.” Then, He was gone.

I knew it was real. I was thrilled. I was changed. Forever.

But I didn’t know how to write but I knew I could and I felt the words. I finished work and went home and looked at all the writing books I had collected. (which was funny because I was not writing anything just collecting these books).

I remember sitting in my apartment closet thinking about the writer I felt I was but didn’t know how to start. I had no clue.

I went to church that night and forgot about the word of the Lord (shocker I was that distracted). But the pastor came up to me during the prayer part of service and gave me a word from God. She layed her hands on my head and said these words…

“Sis Stephanie today the Lord came to you and told you that you would write a book and that you were to call it Tomorrow is Not Promised and He said that that book will take wings and go all over and you will write many books for the glory of God.”

I was shocked. I was floored. I was stunned. Like how did she know this. I knew it was God. But my mind was reeling.

Everyday from that day all I thought about was writing. Every single day even to this day all I think about it writing. Not a day goes by where I am not thinking about books or book ideas. I have kept a journal because I keep book titles and ideas I hear and I have 286 titles of books listed in this journal. Writing means everything to me. I would start and stop books and write little things but never got in that flow or knew “this was the book”.

26 yrs later I finally wrote it Tomorrow is Not Promised: A Personal Journey of Total Submission to Holy Spirit and it would be the first book I would put on Amazon in 2016. You can get a copy here on Amazon.

Pain With a Purpose

Through a truck ton of circumstances I had to live out this book was finished. I didn’t realize it would take this long but it did. I had to live through a horrible divorce, horrible horrible depression, pain, rejection from my husband, family, friends, raise my sons alone, and miracle after miracle of God providing to get that book out to the world.

I had to everyday get my emotions in check which was not easy at all. Only the people very very close to me know how unglued I used to be and struggled emotionally but yet I obeyed God. I was obedient to His word when my flesh wanted to act out in anger (and I did several times) .

When I wanted to die, commit suicide, leave run away, never go to bible school, lost friends, and more I kept going. It was so incredibly painful learning to survive from a failed marriage after losing what I truly believed God gave to me. 

I lost my best friend to divorce and cheating. He left in April 2010 in the most horrible way to be with a mistress that was in labor. I thought I would die. It left me angry. So angry I wanted to hurt the mistress bad, I wanted her to die by me and I wanted to go to jail and my sons go to DFACS and husband be injured in the hospital. I was so bitter towards God. Just do something God! He did but He did it in me. 

I had no idea He was using all that for the book and more!

I went to bible school and learned the most precious things that most churches DO NOT teach. I started helping women even while in my pain and I learned to forgive with Forgiving Forward ministries. I learned that almost every problem people have is linked to unforgiveness and if you don’t believe me come talk to me. 

I learned to forgive (as you will see in the article) and healing came. Healing came in my mind and heart that only Jesus can do. I went to bible school got a doctorate in theology, raised my sons who are wonderful. I wrote more books, taught women, started a podcast and more all while being in depression.

I watched God take care of me and provide what we needed like manna. Everyday there was provision and God was faithful all the time. I came a long way from crawling to the bathroom from the bed in depression and black hole of suicide thoughts to this woman today. 

I talk more about the struggles in the book and how God taught me to overcome.

As time went on my heart in writing began to open up to writing memoir. I really felt called to write other people’s stories. So I put myself out there did videos and such to write YOUR story. Because everyone has a story. But one opportunity after the other went dead. People backed out of contracts they had no money which meant I had no money.

I was crushed but still obedient to God in everything. I still refuse to give up on the dream of writing memoir because I love the genre. Stories heal and bring inspiration. Stories die with people if they do not write them down.

The Lord said in July 2022, “You will write other peoples stories”, while I was making the bed. I said how and He said I will send them. I was thrilled. Like yes let’s go God. But months went by. No writing yet.

Then July 2023, a man was having a conversation with me said, “Have you ever thought about writing the stories of the incarcerated?” I was like NO but thought to myself wow that would be great. Everything in me felt something when he said it. I wanted it bad. I wanted to do it but my next thought was people in jail have the best God stories but they have no money and they have no money when they are out of jail. That won’t work God. But the desire never left me to do it anyway but I didn’t know how. 

A week later, a lady from Victorious Living magazine posts on Facebook and asks for someone to help them write the stories of the incarcerated. I knew it was me! 

She talks to me and says can you write for free..I was like well ok.. only because I heard God say it. And she said can we get your story? I said what story, I don’t have a story and never been to jail. She said yes you do. You could have if you had killed that woman your husband left you for in your anger. We heard your podcast you are the one. We want your story because it is such a powerful story of forgiveness we want you to write it. So I did. 

I wrote my story and talked about the Tomorrow book and gave it to them, they sent a professional photographer, did a photo shoot and they recorded a prison podcast as well.

The miracle begins

Now the miracle….. the story of all my pain, my hurt, my forgiveness of the husband and mistress and all that crazy…my God took it, used it and put my story and my book in a prison magazine with a prison podcast that will go to EVERY PRISON, JAIL AND RE-ENTRY program in the UNITED STATES! 

Do you see it?

Yal…God took my book… it took wings and went all over the country and I didn’t and couldn’t have even asked for this if I thought about it for a year. God did just what He said after almost 34 yrs of speaking it to me because He is faithful. He has taken care of me everyday since my husband left. My sons have seen the miracle after miracle of provision and the good and the bad. 

This article opportunity is God being faithful. I don’t know where the book will go from here. But I know God is true to my book called Tomorrow is Not Promised: A Personal Journey of Total Submission to Holy Spirit because through that magazine, it is taking wings and going all over.

That word spoken almost 34 yrs ago has come to pass. I don’t know who it will land on and where or what the impact will be. I write for the magazine as God said that day by the bed. I do write other people’s stories but not the way I thought I would. This is a small role but crucial role and that is enough for now.

I lived every word of what I wrote. I will keep on seeking to write other people’s stories and maybe your story. But I wanted to share this with you if you are waiting on a promise, it will come. These are a few photos from the photo shoot by Anne Say who is a wonderful photographer and now my friend who is another miracle to the story too. 

Here is the story link called The Beauty in Forgiveness.

I never thought God could make my life beautiful again. But He is slowly doing that. It is not perfect and not where I would like it be right now. But it’s okay. It’s where He wants it to be. But there is beauty in forgiveness. Read my story in the link and others in the magazine. They are the best stories ever. I will forever be grateful for how horrible my husband treated me and left us, the pain was unbearable and mental suffering was torture. The rejection was cruel for myself and my sons but if it all hadn’t happened, I would never know Father God like I do and be His beloved and for this it was all worth it.

God truly takes what the devil meant for evil and turns it for our good. I stayed the course and obeyed God because one day deep in my pain He said “you will minister to women and set them free if don’t let go and let me heal you in the fire”.

Fire came too. Being obedient costs you something and it looks like something. It looks like burning up all you want to be His. One day I will write my own memoir because there is way more to tell. Until then…I keep going. 

God bless you.

*please leave a comment if this story touched you.